It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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