Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
