I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
