if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
