How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
