We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
