I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
