You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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