She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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