I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
