So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize