so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
