he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
the gays at disneyland are vicious
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize