Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize