My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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