Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
