Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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