so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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