i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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