it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
