You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
