This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Randomize
