on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
