drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
