I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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