I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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