He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
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