Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
