I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
