She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
