Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
