Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
