So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
My legs feel like baby dolphins
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
