? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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