i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
It was confusing and full of hummus
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
