Where did you get a picture of my penis
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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