Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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