Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
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