i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
