wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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