That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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