we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
