do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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