He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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