Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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