I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
