those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
