As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
