real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
he laminated a picture of his dick.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
