My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
